Tuesday Morning

Today is going to be one of those rare day when I will be in my PJ's all day.  Feel like I've been run over by a Mac truck.  The doctor feels the stomach and back pain are all from my stomach and he prescribed Prilosec..  Only 2 days on it and will say if this is the solution then hopefully it will kick in soon, real soon.  The other med Clonazepam 1 mg is making me very, very tired.  I did sleep a good 8 hours last night and feel like I could sleep lots more.  This drug is to help control the shakes, anxiety attacks and hopefully control another Panic attack of which they felt that is what I had Friday night.
My doctor said the problems which sent me to the hospital were not necessary unexpected but he did want to stress that I weaned my self exactly like any doctor would have.  Everyone reacts differently and my body was not liking that it was being completely cut off from something that it had for about 15 years.
I am not condoning people who use drugs but after going through this I can see why some go back on the drugs they were trying to get off of .  Not an easy thing but obtainable.
Things will get better, just going to take some time.

Update on How I am Doing

Friday afternoon and early evening were horrible.  Just to think that I was ridding my body from a powerful drug and it was treating me so horrible.  The stomach pain, back pain and dry heaves plus a lot of other symptoms got more than the best of me and I went to the local emergency department.   Its amazing how fast they see you when your blood pressure is sky high, extremely fast heart rate and the artery on the right side of my neck according to the nurse who checked me in was a little terrifying to her.  I spent about 8 hours there and had lots of blood tests and a CT.  They thought the back pain was possible an aortic dissection.  Thankfully that was not the problem, they feel it is from the withdrawal.  After being stuck 4 times they were able to get in 2 IV lines, one for the fluids and the other needed to be a large line for the CT.

I had blood tests, urine tests, CT and they only thing I know is that I did do the correct method weaning my self but the prescription I was taking is one of the hardest to stop and is the hardest to get off of.  I WILL not go back to taking that specific prescription.  My very favorite ER doc came in later that night for his shift and I asked my nurse  to have him come in to talk as a friend.  He was my family doctor until he went through a nasty divorce and gave up his practice to practice emergency medicine.  I got enough hugs from him to last for a couple of year.  He talked to me as a friend and not a doctor and made me see that I need to find a prescription that will be good for me and one that I will stick with through the rest of my life.

The CT did show something that had nothing to do what I was going through and I saw my doctor today  The ER gave me 10 pain pills which we knew would cause itching but there just isn't any pain meds I can take without severe itching.  I took benadryl to help with the itch but it did not work.  That's it for me no more pain pills.  We will have to deal with that at a later time I am taking the lowest strength of ativan and this has been a short term  blessing.

Doctor put me on a couple short term meds and am waiting to be scheduled to have a needle biopsy on the lesion/nodule on the right lung bottom lobe.  LIFE!!!

Bits and Pieces

Up at 4 AM today after 3-4 hours of sleep.  This not sleeping is taking a toll on me and not sure how much more I can take.

I am now completely off all medicine for depression and I will honestly say that the last week has been rough.  The ups and downs have been HORRIBLE.  I will give it a couple weeks and if not better will make an appointment to see my doctor.  I HATE to have to start taking anything again but if I don't feel better I will.  I sure was hoping that I could get completely off that type of medicine.
 
Have to go to town today for some yearly blood work.  The doctors office called the beginning of the week and said I could not have any more refills on my blood pressure or thyroid pills until I got it done.  I can't think of anything else I need to do in town so it will be a quick trip.  It takes me about 25 minutes to get there for a 5 minute procedure, a good hour and a half out of my day.  I asked for an early appointment and the earliest they had was 9:50.  I would have preferred earlier but that is all they had.  Boy am I being fussy or what.  Patience is not something I have ever been blessed with and right now I am worse than ever.

On a positive note; my Etsy store is going very nice.  I opened it January 6th and have sold 65 listings which was 40 orders.  I am not making huge amounts of money and can't quit my job, whoops, this is my part time job now since I retired but it is money I am putting back for vacation or whatever else we decide.  I also list several things on Ebay each month and also have done very well selling things there.

Can hardly wait until it gets and stays warmer.  I LOVE being able to get outside everyday and doing yard work.  I would mow grass all day if I could.  Being on the mower to me is so relaxing and rewarding.  You can see instantly a huge difference in what you have accomplished and being OCD I can control how it is done.  I also am anxious to get this years gardens in.  Ron and I also need to get the turkey coop built and get them in their own area.  Thelma should start laying eggs in a couple of months and want them in their own area by that time.  Right now it is so muddy out back and too cold to work out.  I looked at the forecast until the 24th and it does not look promising to get anything done.  Oh well it is still winter and that is to be expected.

Me in a Nutshell

This past 6 weeks have been an adventure.  Years ago I was diagnosed with chronic depression with episodes of major depression.  At first I just dealt with it the best I could then I started taking a couple of prescriptions to help.  Also for as long as I can remember I have had trouble sleeping and about 5 years ago starting using a prescription to sleep.
In December I decided that I was going to stop taking prescriptions for both things and read up on how to best stop taking the meds.  First thing I want to say is you should consult your doctor before stopping any prescriptions and not to follow how I did it.  Everyone is different and this is just how I did it.  On the first prescription I just went "cold turkey" and had no noticeable effects at all.   Then I started weaning myself from the sleeping pill.  Sleeping pills are not physically addictive but are mentally addictive plus I love my sleep.  Weaning myself from the sleeping pill took about 3 weeks.   This was one of the most difficult things I have done and I will say that being addictive to them physically or mentally is horrible.  For the last month I have been slowly weaning myself from the last prescription I was taking.   So far I don't have any negative effects except for being able to sleep is worse than ever.   I am going to try some of the herbal teas that I have read about and hopefully that will help some.
Some will ask why I decided to do this and my answer is that the time was right.  I don't work and have to get up everyday at a certain time so if I don't sleep I just have to deal with it the best I can.  A lot of my stress in the last 12 years was work related and since I am retired a lot of the stresses are gone.  
Why did I tell you all this?  I am a open book person, I will always tell you if I made a mistake or did something wrong.  If I did or said something I will tell you, I am not afraid to admit it.  So this is old me in a nutshell, good or bad, it's me.

My Find

This past weekend I found the above item at an auction.  The minute I saw it in a box of kitchen items I knew I was going to do my best to get it.  My mother and grandmother had one of these and I have looked everywhere to find one.  I can remember my mother using one of these all of the time.  I loved to go to my grandmothers when she used this.
The above item is a noodle cutter.  My mom would make noodles one batch at a time and used this often.  All the noodles were cut the same size and a nice width.  My grandmother would make several batches at a time and would drape white feed sacks on the back of her kitchen chair and then drape the noodles over them to dry.  It was fun to see the noodles all over the kitchen and flour was everywhere.  The floured areas were an instant writing surface.  I would use my finger as the drawing tool and make pictures everywhere I could find flour on the counters, table and floor.  I was a kid just being a kid.

Laundry Type Days

Yesterday and today's weather was nice enough to get all the sheets from the last month washed and hung out to dry.  Today I washed all the rugs in the house and also hung them out.  Since I have an abundance of sheets for the beds I just kept putting them in the pile waiting.  It was so nice to get them done and also nice to hang out laundry.  All winter I have hung laundry in the laundry room and being able to hang it out and the smell of laundry that is hung out to dry is so nice.  Can't wait until I am able to hang out laundry all the time again.  Come on Spring!!!
 

My Crochet Purses/Bags Going to Georgia

Most of you know that I opened an Etsy store almost 4 weeks ago.  In my store I have a variety of vintage rescued items from estate sales, auctions and have my rag crocheted items.  A gentleman from Georgia saw my rag crocheted items and contacted me about 2 weeks ago asking if I would send him one of my purses so he could evaluate it for his store.  We wrote back and forth and I agreed to send it to him at a reduced price.  After looking it over he wrote and asked if I could make one with a shoulder strap so this weekend I made up 3 of them and sent him some pictures yesterday.  He  wrote back and wanted them plus 3 of the original ones.  He picked out what he wanted and paid for everything and now they are their way to Georgia.
What started out by seeing something while surfing, crocheting to rehab my hand after surgery has lead to this.
When I make the purses/bags I use ALL recycled items and a wonderful reader sent me some buttons that I have been using and some of the material I am using is from my sister-in-law Gale from Texas.  So I have items from Illinois, Texas and Pennsylvania going to a shop in Georgia.  Pretty neat.

Shoulder strap bag.

Close up of the shoulder strap purse.

One of the original style purses that went to Georgia.